Waiting to Breathe

Maybe it's too much to ask... but I want, more than almost anything, to hear you say those three little words. I shouldn't want this, not only because it will open a whole new can of worms, but because you might not even feel that way. But I want to know. I want to know so badly that I refuse to ask. That probably doesn't make any sense... but I just can't do it. What if you don't feel that way? What would you say then? Then again, what if you do feel it, so you say what I want to hear? What if you say it just to make me happy, but aren't ready to? What if neither of us are ready? Honestly, I have no idea what would happen if those words were tossed into the tornado of craziness that is our relationship.

Here's what I think: I think this thing, whatever it may be, is too big to be stuffed into three itsy-bitsy words that are too often tossed around casually. I think it's deeper than that now, and maybe using those words would make them mean so much less than they ought to.

If you by chance read this, please don't think I'm crazy!
Just know that I'm not willing to lose you.