Liar

don't call me a liar and make yourself out to be a saint.

you don't deserve that kind of credit.

because guess what?

EVERYONE LIES.

[i think i've already been over this.]

i'm tired of acting like everything was perfect between us.

news flash: it wasn't. ever.

you know it just as well as i do.

so do yourself a favor and stop being a naive baby about it.

what are you to me now?

nothing but a memory, really:

a picture on my desk.

a number in my phone.

a song on my iPod.

a note in my closet.

you see, even now that you're gone, you're still everywhere.

did you know that you still have a movie and book of mine?

i have a picture that would tell you everything you need to know

about what went wrong between us:

your shortcomings manifested in a single image.

but, not just that. this picture is it. you would know if you saw it.

you would understand immediately.

but i know you, and i know how it would affect you.

i might even know you better than you know yourself.

all in all, you'll never see this picture that i speak of.

i don't know if you'll even read these words.

because if you don't, you'll be none-the-wiser about the picture.

and frankly, i think you're better off that way.

[isn't it sad how even now i don't want to hurt you intentionally?]

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i realize that i write to (mainly) two people in this blog, when i'm not making a general address. for some reason, that makes me want to laugh out loud. maybe it's because one person reads it, and the other, to my knowledge, does not, and i can't decide which one would benefit more from reading.

i wonder if a random reader would immediately label me as a bitch by my writings. if that's the case, i guess it doesn't really affect me, but i'd rather if you read deeper into my reasoning (which i think you'll find in previous posts), and then you'll understand.

okay, so i lied. i know who would benefit more from reading this, it's pretty obvious.

on to school crap:

well, it's by and large... crap. haha.

i have alright classes, and i have at least one good friend in each one.

but the fact that it's school makes it kinda suck. obviouslyyy.

when i see you walk by,

you do something to me.

and everytime you're by my side,

you know my heart keeps skipping a beat.

Heaven only knows, that i want you so.